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Joke of the Day

"When I said ""I'm really good in bed"" I was referring to sleeping. Sorry for the misunderstanding, you can pull your pants up now."

"A fish swims into a wall....... Dam."

"What is the difference between American teen girls and Muslim teen girls? American teenage girls get stoned BEFORE they have sex."

"If I was a transformer, I would turn into Megan Fox's vibrator"

"How do you make Manischewitz Wine? Kick him in the nuts."

"Don't mind me. Just over here shaking my phone like a Magic 8-Ball, trying to get the screen to rotate back."

"Why was the scarecrow promoted? He was outstanding in his field."

"What's the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger."

"You know who brings a knife to a gun fight? Cannibals. And also a fork."

"Events like the death of the Indian gang-rape victim just help remind me why I hate humans so much."