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Joke of the Day

"My dating life."

Next Joke
 
"When attempting to make a good first impression imagine how important good grammar is. Wrong. Importanter."
"Professor i'd like an extension on my paper. why? well my ex just got married & i have to comment ""lame"" on all her wedding pics on facebook"
"Never trust anybody who has graph paper. They're always plotting something."
"Him: Favorite workout? Me: Pilates. Him: Why? Me: Because we lay down for an hour."
"What did our parents do to kill boredom before the internet? I asked my 13 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either."
"I like my panties like I like my bass... Dropped"
"I wonder what the parking situation is at the Special Olympics? ...."
"I cook with wine sometimes I even add it to the food."
"In the game of poker, you have to play the hand you're dealt. Unless it's a literal hand. Then it's a redeal."