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Joke of the Day
"I love the queen in chess... I always mate with her."
Next Joke
"On average, an American man will have sex two to three times a week; whereas a Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year. This is upsetting news to me. I had no idea I was Japanese."
"When your parents held you as a baby for the first time, they secretly hoped you'd end up arguing with strangers on a celebrity's Instagram."
"How do Spaniards take their coffee? Au lait."
"...and the award for best lead actress in a dramatic role goes to me for ""I Have A Sinus Infection, Why Don't You Care That I'm Dying"""
"How many paedophiles does it take to change a lightbulb? No more than 12."
"Do let me know if you're ever unhappy with any of my Tweets. I will block you immediately. Anything to stop you being sad. You're welcome :)"
"My wd-40 can rusted. It was irony."
"To err is human, to arr is pirate."
"How are Pornstars paid? Income"