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Joke of the Day

"Student loans: because you should know what it's like to be one of the poor people you're always going on about"

"As a kid my mom laughed at me because I was always worrying about being shot with a crossbow while on the toilet. Well who's laughing now?"

"Q: Is Google a he or a she? A: A she, no doubt, because it wont let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas."

"What's the difference between a troll and a goblin? I never come home to find my wife troll up some guys nuts!"

"*Me, getting my arm bitten off during a zombie apocalypse* 5: *crying* Me: It's okay, son. 5: You said you were gonna get me a snack."

"Why can't you make fun of Steve Jobs' death? ... Because it's not PC"

"Sometimes I wonder how vegans can survive off what little they can eat and then I remember they just feed off attention."

"What does 9/11 and owning CP have in common? The government will watch you for the next 15+ years"

"what if Spider Man has to stop a crime in the countryside"

"I hate people who have a great timing with jokes. When I do it I get responses like ""Who are you and why are you at my grandma's funeral?"""