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Joke of the Day

"Today, I saw a black guy wave to an Asian from across the street. It gives me hope for the future... Rush Hour 4!"

"Why don't biology and physics get on? They lack chemistry."

"What do you get if you cross a glow-worm with a python? A twenty-foot-long strip-light that can squeeze you to death."

"Why does ""new and improved"" always end up ""expensive and shitty""?"

"I let Ellen drive the bus... Pao! Atlest she was able to digg our graves."

"Some people are too chipper early in the morning. They don't realize how bad it is for their health.....until I'm choking them"

"So true... Q: Why do women have boobs? A: So you have something to look at while you're talking to them!"

"A summary of all Jewish holidays: They tried to kill us. We won. Lets eat."

"What's the powerful weapon in Greenland's arsenal? The Nuuklear Bomb"

"I started dating an optometrist, but she left me... She just said she couldn't see me anymore."