26151

Joke of the Day

"BREAKING: Scientists send teen girl back in time to report on WWII. ""Hitler's haircut is literally the worst,"" she writes. ""Also he's mean."""

"4: can you whistle? M: *whistles* 4: Here's a booger. M:... 4: Keep it forever. Have kids they said. It'll be fun they said. Liars."

"Do you know how we know that Santa Claus is married? Because he only comes once a year! Merry Christmas. P.S. I'm sure this joke has been told somewhere but just in case someone hasn't heard it."

"I'm thinking 'FUCK YOU' real loud at the people around me right now & they don't have a clue. I'm owning them so hard & they have no idea."

"A Chinaman goes to the eye doctor.... Eye doctor says ""You've got a cataract."" Chinaman says ""No, I drive Rincoln Continental."""

"Two medical students are about to witness an autopsy for the first time... One asks the other, ""What do you think it'll be like?"" The other student shrugs and says, ""Remains to be seen""."

"What do you say to comfort the grammar nazi? There, their, they're..."

"What do a married guy and a single guy have in common? They both think the other one gets laid more."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cameron ! Cameron who ? Cameron film are needed to take pictures !"

"The biggest lie in advertising is someone taking a bite of a hard shell taco & it not immediately exploding in their hands."