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Joke of the Day
"If the first piece of advice from any life coach isn't ""avoid bears"" you're being scammed."
Next Joke
"Hey, Sean Bean, it's either Shaun Baun or Seen Been. You can't have it both ways."
"I tried to give myself a sex change but I couldn't quite pull it off."
"When villainy didn't pay anymore, The Riddler got a job writing furniture assembly instructions for IKEA."
"I was sucking off my new Thai bride, last night When I thought.. ""Hang on a fuckin' minute"""
"If you are what you eat, then my dog is a calculator."
"What does the B in Benoit B. Mandelbrot stand for? Benoit B. Mandelbrot"
"Kanye on the beach, by the water, holding two large conch shells up to either ear. ""That's incredible"", he says ""When did I record this?"""
"[shines flashlight under chin] In my day, kids ate gluten and rode bikes without helmets and OPEN LETTERS DIDN'T EXIST [children scream]"
"What do you say to a two headed monster? Hello hello."