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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend accused me of sleeping with her sister and I was like, ""How can that be possible when her snoring keeps me up all night?"""

Next Joke
 
"It's hard to say what my wife does for a living She sells sea shells by the sea shore."
"What do West Virginians call a pretty woman? A tourist."
"What's the difference between a magic show and a strip show? A magic show is full of **cunning stunts**"
"Remember when you thought if you accidentally swallowed apple seeds, a tree would grow in your belly? God I miss my 'Thirties'...."
"I must have an amazing butt because every time I finish talking to someone & turn around to walk away, I hear them whisper, ""What an Ass!"""
"Whats the sickest piece of art? Pneumonia Lisa"
"What do Bill Cosby and Santa Claus have in common? They both come when you're alseep."
"Who was the fattest Renaissance painter? Donutello * I love pun jokes give me some more"
"What's a turtle's favorite type of shoe? Green clog. (looks almost like a turtle shell)"