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Joke of the Day

"A man buys shares from the stock market. But he never shared any of it."

"Q: How many Librans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Er two. Or maybe one. No --- on second thoughts make that two. Is that okay with you?"

"The NSA can see our emails but can they see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?"

"Why do penguins have skinny penises because they only have flippers"

"A recent study found out that 9 out of every 11 jobs are done inside"

"A grasshopper walks into a bar... And the bartender says ""Hey, we got a drink named after you."" And the grasshopper says ""You have a drink named Steve?"""

"Not a joke, sorry, but I'm new to this subreddit... Does this subreddit actually have 36 million ""humorists"" or is that a joke? If so, I don't get it."

"Happy Groundhog Day everybody!!! So put your little hand in mine and there ain't no hill or mountain we can't climb..."

"I wish I had an old Asian man for a pet. That way I could name it ""Old Yeller"""

"Friday. The golden child of the weekdays. The superhero of the workweek. The welcome wagon to the weekend. The famous F word we thank God for every week."