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Joke of the Day
"I just got a papercut... we'll just see if I recycle this week... stupid cunt tree."
Next Joke
"[in ambulance] ""Sir, do you know your blood type?"" ""Yeah [coughs & points to wound] red."""
"A man walks into an apple store and...... farts every one is really angry and there all shouting so he says it's not my fault you don't have windows"
"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down."
"I'm at my most fake news when I tell my husband how much money I spent shopping."
"Why were the vets and pounds mad? It was raining cats and dogs"
"When Yoshi gets sick from eating too many goombas, what procedure should Dr. Mario conduct? A Nintendoscopy!"
"What kind of fish has no father and looks like shit? A Bassturd."
"What's the easiest way to come out of the closet? 1. Open door 2. Walk out"
"me: i'm really glad we met, i feel like I can completely be myself around u. u had me at hello kidnapper: pls stop talking"