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Joke of the Day
"Did you know the ninjas have gotten together and formed a union? They strike from the shadows."
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"[if Lois Lane was a witness] Criminal: *puts on glasses* Lois Lane: I'm sorry, I've never seen this man before."
"How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb? nobody ever changed that light bulb because we are to fat and lazy to do it"
"I've only seen Magic Mike, can I see Magic Mike XXL... ...or do I need to see the other 28 in between first?"
"There were two old men... That were sitting on their porch, when a dog comes up and starts licking his dick. One old man said, ""I wish I could do that "" Then the other said, ""that dog would bite you."""
"What's the definition of a male chauvinist pig? A man who hates every bone in a woman's body, except his own."
"What did France say to Turkey? That's not nice."
"What's more Irish than eating potatoes? Not eating potatoes."
"Sales of Advent calendars down by 80% this year It looks like their days are numbered"
"Persuading girl into having sex with you is like spreading the butter on a toast. It is possible with credit card, but it makes more sense using a knife."