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Joke of the Day

"I was going to tell a dick joke... But now I can't seem to 'member it."

"Why are black fathers always missing? Because white cops always shoot them for no reason."

"How do Australians sleep? With their heads at the foot of the bed."

"In September a 127 yr old woman passed away, which we already KNOW is a lie bc the earth isn't even 127 yrs old. Don't be ignorant."

"Why did the chicken soup cross the road? Because it was down hill!"

"Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird? A: She threw it off a cliff."

"Junkie grandson : Grandma,grandma did you see my pills I left on the table ? Grandma: F*ck the pills,did you see those dragons in the kitchen ?"

"Thanks to ringtones, I now associate all my favorite songs with the annoyance and dread of being interrupted and having to talk to somebody."

"A man is in urgent need for transplant buttocks after an accident. Doctors report no end in sight."

"You know I'm glad there are women in the world... Otherwise life would be a pain in the ass."