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Joke of the Day

"Did you know that in any given group, only 9/10 of people understand basic math? The other 3% doesn't."

"Call-in sick every morning to somewhere you don't work"

"It's like taking candy from a baby - A GOOD IDEA IF YOU DON'T WANT THE BABY TO LOSE ITS FEET TO DIABETES BEFORE IT TURNS ONE."

"How did Obama react when he heard Donald Trump won for president? [*removed due to copyright infringement*]"

"I would tell a joke about fat people, But they have enough on their plate as it is."

"All these years and the ""insert thumb and lift"" tab on macaroni and cheese boxes is still lying to us."

"[taking baby's shoes off & examining the soles] ""Oh look, completely clean. It's almost as if you were carried everywhere."""

"Your mama so stupid she thought Dick Cheney was a way to keep a man around."

"Last night after we had sex I asked my wife if she was faking it and she said ""no, I really was asleep."""

"Q: What is Clinton's plan to create thousands of small businesses? A: Take thousands of big businesses and wait four years."