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Joke of the Day

"I love how people always leave voicemails when I miss their calls. It's like they want to be ignored twice."

"How do you get a goldfish's attention? A U! Fish!"

"Salt touched Pepper in a pervert way.Pepper says: ""This is assalt!"""

"Why can Egyptian crocodiles never admit when they are wrong? They're always in de Nile."

"What is up with these reposts? It must be heredditory."

"Q. Why was Goliath so surprised when David hit him with a slingshot? A. The thought had never entered his head before."

"A ponytail so tight I look 5 years younger and everyone thinks I've been smiling all day."

"Do you want to here a joke about TCP Did you get it? Did you get it? Did you get it? Did you get it? Did you get it?"

"What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa stops at three Hos."

"How much does a plumber make in an hour? It depends on how much crack he can produce."