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Joke of the Day

"Looks like Southwest Airlines needs to install a GPS Tomtom in the planes so their pilots don't get lost."

"I felt shit today My finger ripped through the toilet paper"

"I can feel you getting distant from me; my only wish for you is that your destination is oncoming traffic."

"Shortest Joke I've Ever Heard; Dwarf shortage."

"My cat just sneezed directly into my eyeballs so I'll probably be dead soon. Goodbye, guys. No, you can't have my stuff."

"What do you call fake German currency? Question marks"

"The Knicks ....that's all"

"What do you call the men I kidnap and jerk off against their will? Stroke Victims."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A lickalotopus."

"If a bunch of white people running down a hill is an avalanche, what is a bunch of black people running down a hill? A prison break."