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Joke of the Day

"""WHAT?? You ate the last of the cantaloupe?? This is the worst day ever!"" Can you please stop being so melondramatic."

"A zombie walks into a bar and asks for a shot. It was a 12 gauge."

"Q. What do tired line dancers do? A. They Line Down :-)"

"How can you tell when your drowning in milk? When it gets pasteurise."

"small joke truth or dare dare order us pizza"

"What do potheads do when they see a fire? Stop, drop, and roll"

"[First date] Her: i'm a criminal lawyer, what do you do? Me: really, well it just so happens that I... (trying to impress her) ...am a criminal"

"Some scientists believe the ability to create language was because we ate so much meat as primates. That's why vegans can only say ""i'm vegan""."

"My brother lost his job at the rubber factory ... but I think he'll bounce back."

"Whats the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I wouldn't pay fifty bucks for a lentil on my chest."