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Joke of the Day

"I was arrested for assault with a chicken. The cops suspected foul play."

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"I would really like to help you move your furniture tomorrow but I'm going to be too busy sitting on mine"
"The white girls were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of Ugg boots danced in their heads."
"To all the fisherman out there... You da reel MVP"
"Hitlers gonna hitl"
"She told me if I turned off the light I could put it in her butt I guess I should have let the bulb cool first."
"My whole life is that moment when you send an important e-mail mentioning an attachment without the actual attachment."
"Where does the Joker keep a record of his favourite shrubland areas? Heath Ledger."
"How do the ladies get Batman to come? Ask Lt. Gordon to turn on the bat-signal. Get your mind out of the gutter."
"It's hard to think about mama johns staying home with all the children johns while papa johns are away at pizza wars."