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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when two guys open a weed dispensary? A joint venture."

"A guy is at Chick-Fil-A When all of a sudden Tinker Bell shows up. He goes to a worker and says, ""Wow, you guys have fairies in here?"" The worker then says, ""No, our CEO doesn't like it."""

"Bless me, Father, for I have used Comic Sans. It's been eight weeks since my last use of Helvetica."

"What do you call a vegan zombie? A no-brainer."

"The ""bishop"" came to our church today He was a fucking impostor. Never once moved diagonally."

"Don't let... ...an extra chromosome get you down."

"My Aunt Used to Drink 13's It's the Polish version of the seven & seven. Source: my dad... Not sure if he made it up or what but made me laugh."

"I get about your body being a temple but... right now I wanna turn mine into a bouncy castle, it sounds more like fun. I'm all about fun."

"What was the man running around ? - from my 5yr old son Because he wanted to catch some sleep."

"Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it."