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Joke of the Day

"I'm more comfortable hearing my five-year-old repeat swear words in public than I am hearing him say ""uh-oh!"" from another room."

"I'll take ""That's Not A Category"" for $200, Alex. ""That's not a category."" Yes, that's right. ""That's not a category."" I chose that, yes."

"Two sheep are in a field... One says ""Baaaaaaah"" The other one says, ""Fuck, I was gonna say that!"""

"Camp Doctor: Your cough sounds better today! Camper: It should I practised all night!"

"Do you have elections in Japan? Yes, I have one evely molning."

"What Greek tragedy was written by a neckbeard? [Tips fedora] ""M'dea."""

"Did you hear about the Lawyer who showed up to court without his attache? (original joke) Judge threw him out, said he didn't have a case."

"*A burlap bag is pulled off your head, a bright spotlight is causing you to blink* WHERE DOES THE ARCHIVED MICROSOFT OUTLOOK EMAIL GO."

"I respect how the Hamburglar was like, ""Hey, I know I'm at rock bottom here, but I'm going to be professional about it and wear a tie."""

"Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you're donating blood"