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Joke of the Day
"If you have a bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty."
Next Joke
"Why would Pinocchio make a bad criminal? He wasn't cut out for this."
"People are obsessed with this storm but in ten years no one will talk about it anymore, which is why they named it after the movie Juno."
"What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders.... Zing!!"
"What do pirates call fat whores? LAND HO!"
"Joe was chopping wood with his Dad Joe: Dad, I think I want to be a pilot! Dad: That's great, start over there. You can grab that wood and pile it."
"The wife convinced me into taking her to Hawaii if she lost 20 pounds. You'd be surprised how many M&M's someone can swallow in their sleep."
"What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..."
"Every time a woman takes off something she looks better, but every time a man takes off something he looks worse."
"It is said that wearing T-shirts make you feel cooler in Summer I've been wearing a dozen of them but it's still hot like hell. Damn."