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Joke of the Day
"Shout out to people who don't know the opposite of in"
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"As I read my son's suicide letter, I couldn't help but feel that I had failed him as a parent.... His grammar and spelling were terrible."
"Chuck Norris was what Willis was talking about."
"Open your eyes, people! The Three Little Pigs was written by bricklayers."
"I told my wife ..... I'm going to quit my job to become a stand up comedian, and she said, ""You can't be serious""!!!"
"[ during job interview ] - ""Why do you think you would make a good asset to our team?"" - ""I give up, why?"""
"[god making cheetahs] Let's just squish a giraffe and give it whiskers"
"What do you call a gay guy in a coma? A watermelon."
"Did you hear about the baker that died fighting to save his business? They say he went out ""buns-a-glazing"""
"Why did all the sea monsters refer to the kraken as a whore when he died? Because he died choking on a bunch of seamen."