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Joke of the Day

"Me to waitress: ""Do you have frog legs?"" Her response: ""Yes.."" Me: ""Then hop on back to the kitchen and get me a steak"""

"What did the Mama cow say to the baby cow? It's pasture bedtime."

"I complimented someone for their amazing mustache. I don't understand why she threw a fit though."

"I knew I was old when I opened internet explorer."

"They can't spell for shit, but cats sure are good at Photoshopping text on photos and uploading them to the internet."

"Why did the Afgahni get burnt lips? Because he tried to blow up a bus."

"I've been told I look like a young Denzel Washington's white neighbor."

"[hospital] ""We found the problem. There's an entire sheep in your stomach."" ""Is that bahahaad?"" ""Yes. It's causing some internal bleating."""

"U just HAD to be polite & hold the elevator for me. I could have had a nice, quiet ride alone. Instead, I had to be polite & talk about fall"

"Two cannibals are eating a comedian ""Does this guy taste a little funny to you?"""