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Joke of the Day

"What happens when a guy with no legs dies? He punches the bucket"

Next Joke
 
"What is the difference between a football player and a new pimp? The football player *kicks* *punts.*"
"Cant' believe my horse came first yesterday!!' Dad, how many times have I told you i'm not interested in your's and Camilla's bedroom antics!'"
"Why is French person a better team player than a pirate? The pirate says, ""Aye, aye!"" The French says, ""Oui, oui!"""
"Fish must be excellent drivers. Very rarely do you hear about fish getting into car accidents."
"I just got a great deal on lots of digging equipment... It was hole-sale."
"I got told off for masturbating at the gun range. We had very different interpretations of shooting from the hip."
"My penis was fired today... so if anyone has any openings I can fill, let me know."
"What Time Did Sean Connery Arrive at Wimbledon? Tennish"
"I met a girl called simile. I don't know what I metaphor."