229992

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the Polack that crashed a helicopter? He was getting cold, so he turned off the fan"

"Why do the ladies love Jesus? Because he was hung like this! (spread arms out)"

"If you think politicians are the best at 'spin'... you should listen more at funerals."

"me: what's ur favorite thing on the menu waiter: oh definitely the salmon me: oh yes ok i'll have the *orders something that is not salmon*"

"Apparently the safe word has changed to... NOT THERE IDIOT!!! Followed by a swift elbow to the eye...."

"People with a sense of humour are so much easier to talk to and get along with."

"Why did nVidia built the first self-driving car? (on all conditions) Because their drivers keep crashing."

"[Doctor office] -How are you feeling? -Not good. -Any side effects from the medication? *cries tears of fire* -Now that you mention it..."

"What do DNA and Diarrhea have in common? They both run in your jeans (genes)"

"Why don't chickens wear underwear? Because their pecker is on their face."