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Joke of the Day
"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? Ba na na naaa"
Next Joke
"I went to the local swimming pool today... And I asked the receptionist, ""How much for 2 children?"" She replied, ""$9.50."" ""Awesome!"" I said. ""Do I get to choose or is it a lucky dip?"""
"What do you call someone who swings both ways? A child, it's a child on a swing you fuckin' sicko; get outta here"
"They don't treat the black people right. In our neighborhoods, they don't have banks -- they have check cashing."
"On Reddit you get crucified for not checking your facts... But on Tumblr you get beheaded for not checking your privelage."
"I need to lay off the caffeine. My neighbor keeps complaining that I'm tackling her much more than usual"
"Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those ""evolutionary things"" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink."
"A man only buys water from a dancer. His son notices this and after a while he asks him, ""Why do you only buy water from that dancer?"" ""Because,"" the father said with a grin, ""I enjoy *tap* water!"""
"An unsharpened pencil... ...is pointless."
"Did you hear about the cannibal who went vegetarian? He couldn't stop eating swedes."