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Joke of the Day

"Joke of the day Doctor! You've got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say. Doctor: Next please!"

"What is the difference between a Garbanzo Bean and a Chickpea? I wouldn't pay $10 to watch a garbanzo bean."

"The term ""Every 60 second in Africa..."" is stupid Everyone knows Africains don't get seconds. They're lucky if they get a single serving."

"Life is like a box of chocolates... ...Nobody likes the dark ones."

"How do you know when a hiptser is a good secret agent? You've never heard of him."

"I invented a new joke. Plagarism."

"How do Ghosts get Drunk? Booze."

"Relationship or hallucination? Either way, I'm seeing somebody."

"I can still blame my unhealthy eating on ""the holidays"", right? President's Day is coming up."

"Sometimes I like to lie on the kitchen floor and pretend I'm a crumb."