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Joke of the Day
"My 3 year-old wanted to help me cook breakfast... ...but she wasn't eggsperienced enough."
Next Joke
"I'm developing a hand sanitizer that only kills the 00.01% of germs that the others can't kill. I'm going to make a fortune!"
"Thoughts Some think the economy is slowly recovering. Others think it's on the verge of collapse. I think about boobs mostly."
"What's the fastest game in the world? Pass the Parcel in a Belfast Pub."
"I'm a victim of child abuse Some kid in the park called me ugly"
"What's large, gray, wrinkly, and not important? An irrelephant."
"A girl told me she loved vintage once... So I locked her in the kitchen and told her she couldn't vote"
"A guy walks into a grocery store... And buys groceries."
"If you can't handle me at my fattest, then you sure as hell don't deserve me if I ever lose weight. Which could happen, you don't know."
"What do you call a heard of masturbating cows? ....Beef stroganoff"