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Joke of the Day
"My shoes were meant for each other They're sole-mates"
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"Why are Wayne and Garth banned from playgrounds? They hog the Schwing set."
"The dyslexic pregnant virgin said it was an act of Dog."
"Occasionally I like to stroll into a bank, pull a gun, shout ""Everybody be cool!"" and then hand out sunglasses and leather jackets."
"What lies at the bottom of the sea and twitches? A nervous wreck."
"I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past 2 years But no one will take the job"
"The saddest joke I've heard My wife ran off with my best friend... Now, when I throw the stick, it just lays there."
"People say the hardest part of the first date is the first kiss. No idea what they mean, the hardest part of my first date was getting her to take the sleeping pills."
"What's big but small? A midget's ego."
"Got up at 6:30am today. Did some yoga. Had a protein shake. Ran six miles. Started lying about everything."