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Joke of the Day

"If you speak Japanese... Why would you support Trump? He's such a card."

"My sister teaches 1st grade. A boy in her class had a tantrum and screamed ""I hate you!"" and she gently replied ""I know. It doesn't matter."""

"How do you turn a computer into a zombie? Send it a byte. Kind of lame but I couldn't help myself."

"How did the handyman feel after going to the bar? He was hammered."

"Gun loading announcement... Apparently my local radio station had an announcement on how to load a gun. But I never got the bulletin."

"How can you tell if a woman is bi-polar? She works at two different strip clubs."

"Einstein wrote a theory about Space... It was about time too!"

"Women are like Hurricanes They come into your life wild and free and then leave with the PATIO FURNITURE WE BOUGHT TOGETHER SARAH YOU BITCH"

"""daddy where do babies come from"" ""we just don't know, sweetie...*peers through blinds, the sky is dark with babies* ""...we just don't know"""

"I had to bury my girlfriends cat today... He put up a hell of a fight, but I got him covered up!"