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Joke of the Day

"I said this to my girlfriend today, she wasn't impressed Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. I'm shit at poems, Now show me your tits."

"They grow up so fast. My nephew lost his first tooth Saturday night In a fight a with a bouncer"

"A boring joke I totally understand how batteries feel because I'm rarely ever included in things either."

"How do you sum up a cashew? In a nutshell!"

"""Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor""- John joyfully sings as he walks off with the 'Caution: wet floor' sign"

"So there was this fish that was swimming along and saw a wall. And said, dam!"

"What's going on in Paris is outrageous. You think the french would have surrendered by now."

"And, Johnny? How did your school report turn out?"" asks mother. Come on mom, the most important thing is that I'm healthy!"

"Freudian Slip. What Freud wore under his skirt when he cross dressed on weekends."

"I'll never get a dog, but if I had to I'd the kind that doesn't have its butthole displayed too prominently."