22704

Joke of the Day

"Her: Dude, back off. You're totally scaring away all the hot guys checking me out at the gym. Me: You do realize I'm your boyfriend right?"

"How did the Edward Impersonator annoy /r/jokes? He feigned ted."

"What do you do to a chemist after they're dead? you barium"

"What did the pony say when he had a sore throat? Pardon me, I'm just a little hoarse."

"TIFU Don't know why she legally changed her name to 'Up' though."

"What crime was committed against the coffee? He was mugged."

"What's a snake's favourite food ? Hiss Cakes !"

"F.Y.I. ~~ hand jobs from girls who speak sign language....do in fact, count as blow jobs"

"The First Time"

"How do you get a full grown elephant on to the subway? You take the ""S"" out of ""Sub"", and then you take the ""F"" out of ""Way""."