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Joke of the Day

"Someone just used the phrase, 'that's a big load', on this conference call, and suddenly I'm paying attention."

"My friend brags to me all the time about the women he has seen naked We both agreed the internet is awesome."

"The neighbor's daughter is 16 years old. At least, she said she was. How much trouble are you in?"

"What is a cat's favorite tropical destination? Meowi"

"The Flash series must be really good... ...too bad everything happens too fast."

"So everybody hates Crocs yet the company is worth $2 billion!Some of you f*ckers are lying!"

"Why are elephants grey ? So you can tell them from flamingos !"

"Why Couldn't Anyone Understand The Mute Mathematician's? They didn't speak sine language."

"Why don't pencils and graph paper get along? Because they're made out of graphite"

"*Rides unicorn to work* *Gives Bigfoot hi-five* *Chats with mermaids* *Argues with Medusa* *Gets called in to HR* *Fails drug test*"