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Joke of the Day
"A blind guy walks into a bar... Then a table, a chair..."
Next Joke
"I went to the dentist. I sat down in the chair and he said, ""Open up for me..."" ""OK,"" I said, ""my parents don't love me very much."""
"What's ISIS's favorite Country Band? Allahbama"
"""Please. Make yourself at home."" *Brings cat and litter box inside* *Spreads cat poop on ground next to litter box*"
"GM developing car seats which detect how wet your ass is and post the data onto your facebook page, for fun?? fuck eveory thing about this ."
"I just ran into my barber on the street. He asked me how I liked the haircut he gave me last week. I told him it's growing on me."
"Weird how old people suddenly stop being so deaf the second you put music they don't like on"
"Tried to text ""playa"" but it changed it to ""player"" I must have the white iPhone."
"When someone looks over my shoulder while I'm on the computer, I open up a new tab and start searching, ""HOW TO KILL THE PERSON BEHIND ME."""
"Like most parents, I live in fear of the day I have to explain PRETTY WOMAN to my daughter."