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Joke of the Day

"Now let me tell you a joke about a hair dryer... ... nah nevermind. It blows."

"My doctor diagnosed me as a delusional. Edit: Thanks for my first ever Reddit gold, stranger!"

"Dad: ""Son, if you don't stop masturbating you're gonna go blind."" Son: ""I'm over here Dad."""

"I asked a German girl for her number today. Apparently it is 999-999-9999. Weird right?"

"My friend said that onions are the only food that makes you cry. So I killed his mom with a coconut."

"Yo momma so fat... I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing."

"Why did the dog become a lawyer but the cat couldn't? The cat couldn't pass the ""bark exam"""

"Welcome to twitter, where nobody uses their right to remain silent."

"The blind have a braille version of the bible... The Really Holy Bible."

"What did one fly say to the other? 'your man is down'"