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Joke of the Day

"Instead of ""the John,"" I call my toilet ""the Jim."" That way it sounds better when I say I go to the Jim first thing every morning."

"What's the difference between a woman in a bathtub and a woman in a church? The woman in church has hope in her soul."

"It takes 10,000 hours to be really good at something. It's really easy being poor now."

"Do you know the definition of a bonehead? Someone who's marrow minded."

"He told her that trees blossom in her presence. What he meant was that she scares the sap back up into them."

"If life gives you melons You might be dyslexic"

"So this pirate walks into a bar and he has the ships wheel attached to his hips. The bar tender says, ""wow that looks uncomfortable!"" The pirate responds, ""ARGH ITS DRIVING ME NUTS!!!"""

"A man was walking on a nude beach... A man with a foot long dick was walking on a nude beach when he was arrested by the police. The charge? Weapons of Lass Destruction"

"i'm sorry but hating something that lots of people love doesn't automatically make u an interesting person"

"What's the first letter of the Canadian alphabet, eh?"