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Joke of the Day
"How did realism get me banned from Facebook? I sided with cancer on the ""Kids VS Cancer"" page."
Next Joke
"What do Apple and Rose have in common? They both lost jack."
"DOC: good news is you'll make it ME: phew! DOC: ...into the the record book for stupidest way to die ME: *still vomiting marshmallows*"
"In order to catch herpes... You need to think like a herpe."
"What did the flight attendant say to the vulture who dragged two dead raccoons onto the flight? I'm sorry sir, but you're only allowed one carrion"
"I never could get into spanking as a fetish. But, you know, different strokes for different folks."
"""Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes... ....That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes."" ~ Jack Handey"
"What did the plate say to the mug? Food's on me tonight."
"My parents once made me smoke a whole pack of cigarettes in one sitting. To teach me about brand loyalty."
"Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye."