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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard the latest by Lady Marmalade and the Pectin Pack? Oh wait, I forgot you don't like jam bands"

"What's black and white and red all over? A dead zebra."

"Knock Knock Who there? Control freak Contro... Now you say control freak who!"

"Why wasn't Jesus born in the United states? They couldn't find three wise men or a virgin."

"I get home and realize where my house stood a shark now sits dressed as a house with its mouth open Shark:[nervously makes house noises]"

"I had a little bird, her name was enza, I opened up the window and influenza."

"Why are French overweight homosexuals always tired? Because they are fatty gay"

"In the 1945-6 Nuremberg Trials what should have been the opening statement from the defence counsel representing the Nazi War criminals? 'If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.'"

"Why did the farmer vivisect his daughter? He wanted to reverse cowgirl."

"How did the Fonz die? Ayyyds"