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Joke of the Day

"My sense of humor is a little crazy But the dragon rises into the potassium nitrate milkshake at sundown. It's a good day to be a helicopter."

"Relationships are like algebra You always look at your x and try to figure out y."

"What do snakes take to combat their allergies? Anti-hissss-tamines!"

"I scream, you scream, we all scream... The ice cream man kidnapped us; please send help."

"Nothing says I have faith in god like the six inches of bullet proof glass on the popes car."

"I just ran 4.1 Kms and realized you can write anything you want after that and no one will read it purple monkey dishwasher."

"Can a ninja kill someone from a distance? Shuriken!"

"isis was planning to use biological warfare against David Cameron... but they got anthrax mixed up with tampax and poisoned the wrong cunt"

"So a cannibal is walking through the jungle... And he passes his neighbor."

"You know why the fiscal year ends in March and not December? Because the next year starts with April Fools' day."