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Joke of the Day

"*walks in *wife is murdered *looks at mirror (Written in blood) YOUR NEXT ""My next what? *from the closet ""Oh sorry typo I meant you're."

"My grandson asked me what it's like to be married so I told him to leave me alone. When he did, I asked him why he was ignoring me"

"What if cats are born with names & the fact that we call them names that aren't those names is the reason they act irrationally towards us?"

"Google Fonts walks into a bar . . . The bartender says, ""we don't serve your type."""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cole ! Cole who ? Cole as a cucumber !"

"What did the left butt cheek tell the right one..? If we stick together, we can stop this sh*t."

"[gets kidnapped] Hold up, I forgot my phone charger."

"I saw a Prius crash into a Subaru Outback the other day... There was granola everywhere."

"Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run too if your name was ""Raaawwwrgggah""."

"How many Freudian slips does it take to change a lightboob?"