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Joke of the Day

"I know I'm getting old... the other day I walked past a cemetery and two guys attacked me with shovels."

"An Italian engineer was kidnapped in Nigeria. Demands were sent via email to his family, but they just got deleted as spam."

"What is a depressed person's favorite outdoor activity? Cryaking. I'm sorry."

"Damn girl are you a smoke detector? Because you're super annoying and wont shut the fuck up."

"80% of being Donald Trump is just worrying that the wind will blow your weird combover in the wrong direction."

"What do you call an Indian stoner? Man, deep"

"How does Kanye West screw in a lightbulb? He holds the lightbulb and the world revolves around him."

"A man's idea of serious commitment is usually, ""Oh alright, I'll stay the night."""

"Knock Knock who's there? -it's a-me -Amy who? -it's a-me Mario."

"I used to hate having athlete's foot... ...but it's growing on me"