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Joke of the Day

"I love paying full retail for a game and not have all the content available. Said no one ever"

"Wish a poltergeist would move in so there'd be someone else to blame when I lose my shit."

"How do I love thee? Let me count the ways... Five."

"What turns you on the most? Water. It makes me wet instantly."

"Damn gurrrl, is that chocolate on your face? *licks face* Damn gurrrl, that is not chocolate on your face."

"Every time the sun goes down, I get attacked by a horse. What a night mare."

"My mother always scolded me for losing my stuff in school when I was a kid... That's probably the reason why I can't lose my virginity now."

"Water-loo is such a shitty place. Just thinking about it would make me pissed, if I gave a crap."

"How does a flight of steps check out a woman? It stares."

"I was on a date and my credit card got declined. Her credit card got declined too. Then I knew I was in love."