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Joke of the Day

"[while titanic is sinking] me: [mouth full of shrimp at the buffet] I can't believe no one is eating these lol"

"why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? For drizzle"

"I hear my ex is now into cross dressing & looking for same. At least that's what the Craigslist ad I just posted on his behalf says."

"One day Canada will conquer the galaxy... And they'll call it the *Milky Eh*."

"A rouge English cavalier from the Middle Ages is magically sent into the future to depose Thailand's most ruthless dictator. One knight in Bangkok makes a hard man humble."

"""Cool, I love candles. What's with the knives? Wait, stop. Please stop!"" - pumpkin"

"A feminist and a Muslim walk into a bar. - comedy removed due to complaints -"

"The only way I'd be scared of a ghost is if one was coming at me wearing a fitted sheet that I thought I'd have to eventually fold."

"Is a bath relaxing for Michael Phelps or does it just feel like he's at work"

"What do you call a robber who looks like David Beckham? Bandit like Beckham"