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Joke of the Day

"deeply analyzing what you meant when you texted ""k"""

"What kind of pistol should you use to shoot a bear? The one with the smallest barrel. It hurts the least when the bear shoves it up your ass."

"What did the German Kaiser roll say to the French baguette? *Gluten tag*"

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me Than a frontal lobotomy."

"My parents tell me to stop being a smart-alec... ...that's when I respond with ""My name's Tyler..."""

"Two peanuts walking down the street.... one was a salted (assaulted) XD"

"Excuse me, miss, you've got a little bit of face on your makeup there."

"Angelina Jolie needs to take some time off her busy schedule of feeding the hungry and poor in third world countries and feed herself for a change."

"I was going to post a Michael Brown joke.. ..but I'm afraid it would just get shot down."

"I just want to have the poker face of a toddler that tells you that they didn't poop their pants."