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Joke of the Day

"My uncle Terry told me not to worry, that love would find a way, but on the other hand he once took a shit in a hammock"

"I was going on my first date and my mom gave me a whistle... I asked her what purpose does this serve to which she replied, ""to remind you not to blow it."""

"Political correctness gone mad. I can't even refer to my own child as my disabled son. Apparently it's my ""daughter."""

"Two bitches walk into a bar. The bartender says there's a collar for both of you."

"Dear neighbors, I am not killing my child. I'm washing her hair. Only she sees it the other way."

"Knock Knock ""Who's there?"" ""Dunno, but i do know its not Michael Brown"""

"Vanna White's birthday is today... Pretty soon she'll be getting to the age where she has trouble with her vowel movements."

"I call bullshit on the Chinese language. There's no way that shit is real."

"Someone called me a horse today... I just looked at him and said ""Nay!"""

"I bet if Jesus had turned water into Vodka. The Bible would've been a lot more interesting."