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Joke of the Day

"I decided to try out a new Mediterranean recipe that takes 2 hours to cook. I've got a lot of thyme on my hands."

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"Just overheard the phrase, ""pregnant with a baby,"" and secretly wondered what the other options were."
"Don't give your heart to someone unless you're 100% certain that you're dead."
"Man is incomplete until he's married....... Man is incomplete until he's married. Then he's finished."
"What is Trump's favourite movie? Wall-E."
"There is a fine line between the numerator and the denominator Only a fraction of people will get this."
"-""I hear the Israeli PM isn't too worried about that latest hack because.."" -""Please don't"" -""...Benjamin's Not on Yahoo"" -""I'm leaving you"""
"U2 donated that album without charging, and we hate it. That's pro bono and anti-Bono at the same time."
"A Tiger ? What do you do ? When you cum across a tiger? Zip up and run like hell!"
"Why should you never date someone with a lazy-eye...? Because you never know if they're seeing someone on the side."