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Joke of the Day
"just saved a bunch of money on his car insurance by fleeing the scene of the accident."
Next Joke
"I'm attracted to you so strongly, scientists will have to develop a fifth fundamental force."
"Judge: Did you commit murder? Me: I'm a man. I'm afraid of commitment. Judge: hahaha! Me: hahaha! Judge: Life."
"Why did the pig go to the casino? To play the slop machine!"
"Horse-drawn carriages are pretty cool but the horses should learn to draw other stuff"
"I hope puns are okay. If you live downwind from a milk processing plant, everything smells like dairy air."
"[in church] ""And Jesus, our saviour, died on the cross for your sins."" [vicar points directly at me & entire congregation collectively nods]"
"Really, nobody in America won last night. The Mega Millions jackpot went up to $63 million."
"I just saw a guy with a hook hand and a ponytail. Dude, you cut off the wrong thing."
"What do you call a dirty Jew? Alive."