223175

Joke of the Day

"[Driving w/date in car] Date [turns radio to country] Me [reaches over date, opens passenger door] This isn't working. [Hits eject button]"

"Can someone please explain this joke to me ""It shoulds be spelled 'colllllllllllllege cause ive taken far more than 2 L's"" My friend sais L means loses but loses of what"

"What did Nicki Minaj, Hitler and a Feminist say when they walked into a bar? Ouch."

"Not feeling great about how much scrolling down I have to do to get to my birth year."

"How do you know who in the room is a vegetarian? Don't worry, they'll tell you."

"Her: I have Netflix if you wanna come watch a movie :) Me: No it's ok, I have my own account [60 years later on deathbed] Me: Wait a minute"

"What do you call a sea creature that murders people? A Serial Kriller."

"What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it."

"I don't know why everyone is so upset about the rioting in Ferguson The rest of America is going to do the exact same thing on Friday, they just got a head start on holiday shopping."

"People will put up with a lot of crap, but if you respond to someone's text with, ""k"" you have just crossed a line."