222777

Joke of the Day

"I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day."

"[OC] I've got a broken yo-yo for sale. Anyone want to buy it? No strings attached"

"I went to the doctor today and he told me to stop masturbating so much. ""Why?"" I asked. ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""

"My friend is a German butcher He always tells me the wurst jokes."

"I don't care what your bio says. You retweet me, it's not only an endorsement, it represents the views of your employer."

"Why did the witch wear a green felt pointed hat? So she could walk across snooker tables without being seen."

"What's green and has wheels. A dolphin. I lied about the wheels. I also lied about it being green. I lied about the whole thing."

"3YO: Why do I have to share a room with my twin sister? ME: Because we only anticipated having one of you."

"Why does the nazi love to bring his jewish friend to indian restaurants? Because he loves to order some **sizlar** for his jewish friend."

"Scott Summers (X-Men) is dead.. ...by watching his navel. (I don't know if this joke works in English)"