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Joke of the Day

"I was on a date with a girl at the cinema. We both put our hands into the popcorn at the same time, so to make it less awkward, I said, ""Don't worry, that's not the one I masturbate with."""

Next Joke
 
"My favorite knock knock joke Knock knock: Who's there 9/11 9/11 who I thought you would never forget!!!"
"ah, mercury's going retrograde, that explains why i accidentally squandered my entire youth"
"Step on a crack, break your momma's back! So then I went on a walk with my family. I stepped on a crack, looked at my mom, and said ""Why didn't your back break, mom?"" ""You're adopted."""
"I like my drinks like I like my women.... Stiff and cold."
"TIL of Charles' Law: ""The best way to get the right answer on the Internet is not to ask a question, it's to post the wrong answer."""
"Why is a baby like an diamond? Because it's a dear little thing."
"How to fall down stairs Step 1 Step 6 Step 7,8,9,11"
"Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in the fruit salad."
"They should make it slightly less easy to ruin everything."