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Joke of the Day

"I stand in the tampon aisle and when a woman reaches for a box, I snicker and say ""you're gross""."

"OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. hold breath 5 mins 2. die"

"Whoever coined the phrase ""Quiet as a mouse"" has never stepped on one."

"My ex-wife still misses me... But her aim is gettin better."

"Everyone is at the store buying milk and bread to prepare for the snow. I'm buying frozen pizza. Enjoy your milk sandwiches, losers!"

"A man is talking to his friend... ""Today I got a brand new ford for my wife."" ""Eyyy, nice trade."""

"Ironic... is having a coke machine reject your dollar bill for it being rolled up to many times."

"""Can I buy you a drink?"" Sure! What's your name? ""Uhh. I don't know. I never get this far"" You don't know your name? *sweats* Pants are cool"

"Did you hear that Willy Nelson died? He was singing on the road again."

"What brand of shoes do chickens wear? Reebok bok bok"